It seems like just yesterday I was starting the weekly weight loss posts. That time, I was going to do it. For once and for all I was going to lose the weight and keep it off. I got down to just a few pounds away from my wedding weight. I was looking better and feeling great. Clothes were fitting better. I had more energy. I had more confidence. I felt pretty darn good.
I never did reach my goal weight. I met my goal of running a 5k. I was so proud of myself that I did something that I always said I'd do *someday*. And then....it all stopped. I still can't believe it. I ran the 5k and haven't run since. The same morning I ran it, Eric left for a week on a hunting trip so I was home alone with the girls. When he got back, I guess I got busy...or made excuses. Then it got colder, and I had less and less incentive to go out.
With the lack of running came the lack of motivation. I started snacking more. I didn't watch what I was eating. I quit weighing myself. I tried to ignore that the pants that were once to big for me two months prior were now getting too tight. I didn't want to believe that I failed again. Sure enough, I gained every.last.freaking.pound back. Not only that, they brought a couple of buddies with to torment me.
And so, here I am. Starting over again. I'm really pissed that I'm here again. I'm made that there is a constant starting and stopping. A constant roller coaster of monitoring, then eating whatever I want, to feeling good to feeling sluggish.
So, where does that leave me now. I turn 30 in less than 5 months. I am a bit freaked out on that, which is a whole other post in itself. Until then, I've decided that I want to go into my 30s feeling good. Looking good. Feeling confident. I'm sick of looking in my closet for something to wear that will look ok. I want to grab anything and know that it WILL look ok. I see so many styles that I'd love to wear, but feel like I can't. I hope to have better luck this time. I've said the same before, but what is life without mistakes? The bigger thing is to just get up and try again.
I *started* my new diet on January 1st with my 2 sister in laws. I slacked off course. I've been using my fitness pal and tracking everything I've been eating. The barcode scanner is an awesome tool. The first week of tracking everything, I lost 2.5 pounds. I then found out that the calorie goal it gave me was way too low. I found out I was having trouble losing weight because I wasn't eating enough. Honestly, WTH. Why is this so confusing?
I upped my calorie intake, and would find myself eating when I wasn't hungry. My mind is a funny thing. I'd see the remaining calories, and think, "Well, it says I need to eat, so I'll eat." I wasn't going by my hunger cues. I started to snack because it says I could. That's not going to be the right way either.
I think this is going to be a trial and error thing. I need to get my exercise in, and make good meal choices. Clean meal choices.
I am going to try to restart my weekly weight loss posts. It's a good incentive for me to know that y'all can see when I do well, and when I'm slacking. Fingers crossed for the first one.
Here we go again...
Thanks for the votes!